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Christmas/December holidays/New Year's

 

To Donate a Christmas Gift:

Some families handle gift giving dilemmas by annually joining forces with friends, neighbors and family to "adopt" a homeless family, a low-income family, or even a women and children's shelter. It doesn't take much to please these parents and children -- many of them lack even basic necessities, much less toys for their children.

It can be enjoyable for the whole family to put together festive baskets with necessities such as socks, underwear, toiletries, towels, baby clothes -- plus a few toys for children. Such projects are very good at teaching children about the needs of others. Below are a few suggestions for such projects:

bulletA homeless shelter
bulletA women and children's shelter
bulletYour local children's hospital
bulletYour local Veterans Home
bulletA senior citizen's center
bulletThe Salvation Army (USA)
bulletUnited Way of America
bullet American Red Cross
bulletAngel Tree - 1-800-55-Angel ("a national program that brings hope, love and Christmas gifts" to children whose mother or father is in prison)
bulletU.S. Marines Corps Reserve Toys for Tots Program
bullet Operation Christmas Child
bulletLocal food bank

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Safety Tips for Your Family:

bulletCheck out the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission Web site for the latest news on defects and recalls.
bulletMake sure you send in warranty cards so that if a product is recalled, you will be notified immediately.
bulletIf you're buying a product second-hand, call the manufacturer to make sure the product is still considered safe.
bulletCheck your tree for freshness. A dry tree will lose its needles and is more susceptible to fire. Place your tree out of the way and away from the fireplace, electrical sockets, overhead lights, wall heaters, or other combustibles. Water it daily.
bulletAttach the tree to the wall, bookcase or ceiling to make sure it doesn't fall over or that a small child can't tug it over. A wide-based stand will help to keep it steady. Tuck away electrical cords so that they can't be grabbed or tugged, or tape them to the floor and wall.
bulletKeep fireplaces clear of trees, ornaments, Christmas stockings and blankets. Burn only wood, not wrapping paper, mailing paper or evergreen boughs in the fireplace (embers of which can float out of the chimney and start a fire next door, or result in a flash fire when paper or tree needles light and burn intensely). Avoid using flammable liquids in your fireplace. Keep a fire extinguisher nearby.
bulletTake care with "fire salts" that produce colored flames when thrown on a burning fire. The salts are dangerous to children if swallowed, so keep them out of reach.
bulletHave your fireplace checked over by a professional at a regular time each year. Use a sturdy screen and never go to bed or leave the house without making sure the fire is completely out.
bulletNever use candles or other combustible decorations near or around trees. Keep them away from drapes. Keep all matches or candles out of the reach of small children and pets. Never leave burning candles unattended. Turn off lights, space heaters and other electrical appliances, and blow out all candles when leaving the house or going to bed. If you're lighting a menorah, keep it on a high, steady surface. Do not put lighted candles near exits or in windows. Keep your children away from all combustible or electrical objects.
bulletDo not use electric decorations on a metallic tree. The tree could become charged from a faulty string, and a person could be electrocuted.
bulletConsider forgoing poinsettias, artificial snow, spun glass "angel hair," tinsel, and sharp, breakable decorations when you have small children in the house. Poinsettias, holly, mistletoe, Christmas rose, wild arum, yew, amaryllis, and Jerusalem cherry -- along with several other plants -- can be poisonous, or can cause skin irritation or digestive problems (to children and to pets). Keep all plants and decorations up and out of the reach of small children.
bulletPut all breakables high up on the tree, and keep a close eye on younger children to make sure that nothing winds up in the mouth.
bulletCheck your children's gifts, including the wrapping and packaging, for small, removable or breakable parts, sharp edges or corners. Strings or cords longer than seven edges present a strangulation risk to small children. Keep any dangerous gifts away from your children (they can be returned, donated, given to an older friend, or tucked away until your child is older).
bulletMake sure that indoor and outside lights and decorations are used appropriately, and that the cords and lights aren't frayed or broken. Pay attention to instructions for use of electrical decorations. Make sure they're UL-approved, and don't string together more than 3 strands of lights on each extension cord.
bulletMake sure your family has an escape plan in case of fire - and practice it! Have working smoke detectors on each floor (your local fire department can help you obtain smoke alarms and can give you advice for installing and maintaining them). See our Fire Safety page for more.
bulletDo not leave out foods that are potential choking hazards, such as nuts, hard candies, popcorn or candy canes. Never leave alcoholic drinks within reach of children.
bulletWhen visiting with friends and relatives, or if having friends or relatives over, keep a close watch on the children. Small children have a tendency to suddenly fall into swimming pools, fall off balconies, wander out doors, taste medications, swallow earrings, play with guns or knives, harass a jittery pet, pull a pot off a stove, or stick a finger in a socket. Never leave your children unattended in someone else's home.
bulletRemember that when friends visit your home, they can unintentionally be distracted from watching their own children. Try to childproof your home if you know young children are coming over, and keep a close watch.
bulletWhen entertaining, avoid using candles. Provide smoking guests with large, deep ashtrays, and check them frequently. Make sure children know to stay away from ashtrays. Run the contents of ashtrays under a faucet before dumping them in the garbage. After guests leave, check upholstery and trashcans for cigarettes that weren't fully extinguished.
bulletDesignate a non-drinking driver if you'll be drinking while out. If you're hosting a party where alcohol is served, make nonalcoholic beverages available. Avoid serving too much alcohol to your guests, and do not pressure your guests to have "one for the road." Remember that only time (not coffee, food, drinking water, a cold shower or fresh air) will reverse the effects of drinking too much. Insist that any guest who is slurring words, walking unsteadily, or showing other signs of inebriation stay overnight, ride with a friend or catch a cab.
bulletMake sure that everyone buckles up while driving -- even if it's only to the grocery store.

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Suggestions for giving to seniors:

It's tricky buying for seniors. We recommend that (unless specifically requested), you avoid pets, colognes, perfumes, wine, candies or liquor. Good ideas include these:

bulletGift baskets of their favorite food items or bath items or lined note pads, stationery, greeting cards, stamps and pens, etc.
bulletGift certificates for their favorite department store or bookstore, pharmacy, hairdresser, restaurant, theater, deli or concert hall (especially if you offer to go with them).
bulletFor seniors who don't drive, a bus pass or coupons for taxis.
bulletBath robes, sweat pants, blankets, warm sweaters, slippers with non-skid soles and socks (seniors tend to be colder than younger people), scarves, handkerchiefs, mittens.
bulletA cordless telephone, pre-paid phone cards, a computer or an answering machine can be helpful.
bulletLarge-print books, address books or calendars (marked with family birthdays and anniversaries, and perhaps personalized with family photos). You also can offer to rewrite their address book, help them organize photos or letters into a beautiful photo album, or retype something special to them.
bulletSubscriptions to favorite magazines, newspapers, toys or treats for a pet they already have, payment of a monthly bill, or the hiring of someone to shovel snow or cut grass for a month or two.
bulletItems for their favorite hobby.
bulletA book of coupons offering yourself as a gift (you promise to clean their house, mow their lawn, cook a meal, repair broken items, do safety checks, take them shopping, to church, to the country, to see Christmas lights, to the hairdressers, to the park, to the museum, to a concert, etc.).
bulletCrafts handmade by grandchildren (such as a tape with the child's voice or singing on it, special cards, play dough handprints, homemade cookies, poetry or stories, clothing decorated by the child, etc.).
bulletPlaying cards or favorite board games that you or your children will play with them.
bulletSchedule a multi-generational photo session, and frame the resulting photo.
bulletA nice dinner out with you (perhaps without small children, so that you can talk).
bulletFavorite treats or snacks (make sure these don't interfere with medication or a restricted diet).
bulletFor seniors in care facilities, work with the family member or staff to give gifts of a more personal nature. If you can't afford new clothing, second-hand stores and thrift stores often have clothes in excellent condition:
bulletCheck clothes and make sure they're still in good condition and that they fit. If buttons are missing, zippers are broken, or if clothing is stained, offer to repair them or get them cleaned.
bulletCheck for good shoes and slippers with non-skid soles.
bulletCheck for socks and intimate apparel in good condition.
bulletWhen buying clothing, select clothing with large buttons (or no buttons), Velcro, and simple, easy-to reach fasteners.
bulletDoes the family member need a shave, a haircut, a permanent, a manicure, a pedicure?
bulletRead personal mail, a book or a magazine to the family member.
bulletListen to stories from the family member, play cards, go for a walk in a park or playground, take the family member shopping or to church.
bulletCheck to make sure finances are in order, that newspapers and magazines aren't piling up, that correspondence is answered. If not, help bring things up to date.
bulletMostly, keep in touch on a regular basis and let your loved one know you remember and that you care.

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Keeping the Meaning and Spirit Alive:

Sometimes it can be hard to find the spirit of Christmas in the midst of sales, wrappings, tape and bows. Here are a few suggestions for keeping the meaning of the season:

bulletMaintain family traditions: Tell your children why you have the family traditions that you do. Tell family stories, and show them pictures of favorite memories. Tell them how you celebrated as a child, and how your parents and grandparents did. Pay tribute to family members who are no longer with you. Avoid bringing up old wounds, however -- make the tributes positive and sincere.
bulletInvolve your child in the yearly rituals and traditions. Even young children can help bake, shop, wrap, and decorate. If your family attends religious ceremonies, involve your children as much as you can. They can sing, be in Christmas plays, or help with preparations. These traditions will become important paths for your child to follow as he/she grows into an adult and parent. Their involvement will help them see the events and traditions as important, special and worthwhile.
bulletExplain the cultural traditions: Take your child to celebrations, explain what happens and why. Share the history of the holiday, and set aside special and private time for your family. There are several books available for all ages that can help explain the historical and religious meanings of holidays. This year would be a very good year to explore other traditions and to explain the importance of understanding and tolerance.
bulletInvolve your children in charity. Children are naturally generous with others. Even young children can appreciate the value of donating, volunteering and sharing. Your children can help choose the gifts, choose the activity to help with or choose the organization to assist. Your children can help wrap or bake, and they will benefit from being there when it happens.
bulletBegin a tradition of giving thanks. Set aside time at each dinner or bedtime to think about what you're thankful for, and share this with your children. Encourage them to think of what they're thankful for. Avoid forcing them to think of specific things or even to participate - younger children are quite practical and selfish, and that's natural and OK. As they get older, this tradition will become an important part of their lives.
bulletHave a plan for relatives who unknowingly send inappropriate gifts. If you have preferences against certain toys (such as toy guns, types of clothing, music, jewelry or candy), make sure friends and family members know this in advance. Tell your children that certain things are off-limits, and that if these items arrive anyway, the thought will be appreciated and then the item will be donated or returned.
bulletKeep the holidays fun and family-friendly. Make sure children eat properly, go to bed at proper times and maintain naps and quiet times. Avoid discussing painful family issues or any disturbing societal events around them. This does not mean you should be a push-over in front of family members, but try to keep any disagreements or discussions mature and calm. If your children want to ask questions about family members or events, try to answer as honestly as you can in age-appropriate ways. Avoid talking about your children behind their backs. This will help your children learn that open communication with you is a good thing.
bulletKeep spending under control. Begin with a budget, and avoid impulse buying by shopping with a detailed list in hand. Avoid browsing, and avoid good deals unless they are already on your list. If it helps to use only cash, then leave your credit cards at home. Set a limit for each person, and stay within it. Return any unused items. Many experts recommend not exceeding 1.5% of your annual gross income. But even that might be too much for you, and that's OK. Don't think you have to spend a like amount for relatives. Everyone has different spending ability. Many wonderful gifts can be purchased at summer yard sales or quality second-hand stores. Often, a homemade gift (especially from children), or a gift certificate for promised shared time together or help with household chores or with baby-sitting is just what a favorite relative needs. A U.S. Savings Bond costs just half of its ultimate face value. Framed family photos, video tapes of family events, or a sample of a favorite recipe are always appreciated. You can pick names and have each person give one gift to one family member. Or, pool your money with family members to buy one gift for someone.

Other holiday links:

bullet Medem - do a search for "Managing School Holidays and Vacations"
bullet Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh - tips for holiday safety
bulletNational Council on Fireworks Safety, Inc. - stay safe around fireworks.
bulletThe U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission - for up-to-date information about toys and child products
bullet National SAFE KIDS Campaign - buying safer toys
bullet ToySafety.net (National Association of State PIRGs) - annual "Trouble in Toyland" report
bullet National Highway Traffic Safety Administration - holiday driving and driving safely in the winter
bullet Safer Child Winter Safety pages - includes information on weather, driving, & sports
bulletThere are books available to help you with great ideas for parties. Three examples are:1. 50 Fabulous Parties For Kidsand 2. FamilyFun's Parties: 100 Party Plans for Birthdays, Holidays & Every Day and 3. The Ultimate Birthday Party Book: 50 Complete and Creative Themes to Make Your Kid's Special Day Fantastic!
bullet Center for a New American Dream - suggestions for how to simplify the holidays
bullet National Christmas Tree Association - for information on locating a tree farm near you
bullet National Fire Protection Association - using candles safely
bullet The Official Kwanzaa Web site
bullet Kwanzaa Land
bullet Hanukkah Traditions
bullet The Jewish Outreach Institute - explains and describes Hanukkah
bullet National Mental Health Association - "Holiday Depression and Stress"

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