Expert Voices -
PAX: Real Solutions to Gun Violence
-
Tough
Questions and Responses
Tough Questions and
Responses
Anticipate possible reactions and be
prepared to respond:
1. If someone
questions whether or not this is "any of your business," it may be wise to make
reference to other things parents don't normally ask about -- such as car seats,
animals, allergies, access to inappropriate TV or the Internet, whether a child
has been sick or not, etc. This question is no different. You are just trying to
make sure that your child is playing in a safe environment, and you would
welcome similar questions concerning their child in your home.
2. If they become
defensive about being portrayed as "bad parents," reassure them that you are not
passing judgment. It's just that children are naturally curious. In fact, many
tragic accidents have happened to the children of good parents who simply
weren't aware of how important it is to take precautions. Give them examples of
stories you may have heard, such as Carole Price's (who lost her son due to an
accidental shooting while he was playing at a friend's house), to help make your
point.
3. If they say
that they trust their child to not play with guns, explain that, based on the
research you've read you don't trust your own child in the presence of guns and
you wouldn't want to hold another person's child accountable for your child's
actions. **
4. If all else
fails, and the parent(s) refuses to ensure that a present gun is locked up and
safely secured, offer alternative solutions. Tell them that there's no reason
that your differing views on this issue should affect the friendship. Suggest
that you arrange a time for them to meet at the neighborhood playground (or
other spot) and assure them that their child is always welcome to come over and
play at your home. Another option is to schedule a time for your child to play
at their house when you can come along to keep an eye on him/her to make sure
he/she doesn't get into any mischief.
(**
In two separate studies, young children were given a lecture from a police
officer about gun safety and about what to do if they see a gun (i.e., stop,
don't touch, run away, tell an adult). The children were later put in a play
area with a variety of toys, as well as two real (but disabled) guns. The
majority of the children in the research groups picked up, played with, and even
tried to fire the real guns despite having recently been instructed what to do
and what not to do by a police officer.)
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